January 7, 2010

To Barth Or Not To Barth

I am sick. Again. I was sick from day 3 of my Christmas break until the last day, and I am still congested. Then, Wednesday evening I started to feel terrible after eating a frozen organic enchilada. At least that’s what I’m tracing it to. When I took it out of the box the plastic wrap was open so I almost didn’t eat it. I had a definite moment of “This doesn’t look right. It could be contaminated or have a dead mouse in it.” But I was hungry so I ate it anyway. And it was good. About 3 hours later I started to feel like crap and I have decided it is the curse of the organic enchilada. My tummy hurt all night and was just generally pissed off at me. I laid on the couch until midnight doing that breathing/swallowing technique one does when one does not want to barth, as Ethan calls it. Today I feel like I have a hangover…headache and slight tummy ache, although not as bad as last night. Looking back, I really think I should have just let it fly with the barth instead of holding it back. I may have felt better today and I surely would have lost a few pounds. What was I thinking.

So anyway, today was a blog day but my brain still isn’t working and I’ve had to abandon my planned topic and instead resort to asking for sympathy from my readers because I have a boo boo in my tum tum. I was supposed to do day 3 of my running group today, but had to call in sick (Yes, I am running. More on that later.) I was also going to have lunch with a bunch of ladies who call themselves the T.R.A.M.P.S., and we were going to eat Mexican food. So today kinda blows since my running partners think I am a wuss and I stood up a bunch of T.R.A.M.P.S. and I look look like a greasy old hag to top it off.

At least I made it to the computer to write this note. That is progress since I pretty much stayed in bed all day watching “Brideshead Revisited”, texting, and napping. A short note on the subject of texting: The iPhone does a thing called “Predictive Text” in which it finishes a word for you that it thinks you are trying to type, when 99% of the time, the word it chooses isn’t even close to the word you are trying to type. It does this in such a way that most of the time you don’t even notice it has changed anything. This has caused me many problems. Last month I was trying to tell someone that I was having an orange, and it told them “I am having an orgie.” Today I told someone I was home feeling sick and it went out “I am home feeling dick.” Now everyone thinks I am a housewife hooker. Plus, I have no idea why it keeps changing things to sex-related words. When I am feeling better, my first order of business will be to write you all a halfway decent blog entry, and the second will be to figure out how to turn off that damn predictive text before neighborhood men start showing up at my door with wads of cash.

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2 Responses to “To Barth Or Not To Barth”

  1. Becky Mattson Said:

    Haha!! Funny! But I hope ya feel better!

  2. Anonymous Said:

    hope you feel better Patti. The T.R.A.M.P.S are looking forward to you join us at lunch next time.

    Annemarie Rivera

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