September 30, 2009

It’s Swine Time

It’s swine time! My son has been confirmed, and now my husband is convinced that he has it, although his only symptoms seem to be lethargy, whining, being pathetic, and inability to do anything besides eat and use the remote control. He did, however, take a nap today. But why he felt the need to fall asleep drooling his germs all over my side of the bed, I have no idea. I would have rolled him over to his side, but he would only tell me, that as usual, I am mean to him when he is “sick”. I am on day 4 with my son, and Florence Nightingale has left the building. When Ethan asked me to pull a tissue out of the box for him because “my hands are too tired”, is about the same time I snapped. In the last 2 years I have had 5 surgeries (one during which I was accidentally punctured in an organ, and one during which they paralyzed my vocal cord), been diagnosed with a lung disease, and almost died from pulmonary embolisms. Let me tell you something people…I still wrote funny stories about being sick, did laundry, cooked for my family, and ran errands. In fact, I was so jolly during one of my long hospital stays that a few nurses took their lunch breaks in my room because it was “the fun room.” So, I have about a 4 day maximum on patience for my sick child, and a zero day allowance for my husband. I really have no tolerance for a 40 year old man who whines about his “sore throat.” Take it from me…wash those hands, spray the Lysol and pray to God your husband’s stay well. And if you hear police sirens in the ‘hood in the next day or two, turn on the evening news, ’cause it might be me finally losing my mind.

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One Response to “It’s Swine Time”

  1. Anonymous Said:

    I completely feel your pain! I’m currently prego, working, taking my hub to work, and am just getting over the flu and an upper respiratory infection on top of a poorly timed Nair rash all over my legs. I was coughing, hacking, puking, sneezing, itchy beyond belief, overall dying for about a week. My hub coughed a few times in one day and whined about feeling horrible. If I hadn’t been on my deathbed, I would have punched him in the throat. Thank god I had your funny Facebook/blog to keep me entertained enough not to kill him! (: I’m a new reader and am just going back and reading your blog from the beggining. I absolutely love your stuff! You never cease to crack me up. You’ve got a faithful reader in me! -Chelsie Spradlin

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